hello love!

After attending the Deeper '07 youth rally, I can safely say that I have never been more at peace with myself and the things that go on around me. I have finally learnt to let go of the situation and all the disdain that I had housed inside of me after crying my eyeballs out like a blooming idiot at the rally last night. But it is a real comfort as I had not cried for a long time now so I'd finally managed to release all the tension inside of me.

The rally was pretty good. The turn up was excellent and the music and guest speaker were both quite exhilarating. It had really helped me with my problem and I now feel brand new. A deep peace and a tranquil state of mind has fallen upon me and I have never been more pleased. As for my relationship with God, nothing drastic occured but I did receive His second touch and our relationship has really taken a step forward and grown deeper even if not drastically by a mile.

I feel I no longer am that bitter person I was. It had affected me more severely than I thought as it had really changed my outlook on things and also the way I had treated the people around me. To all those people that I had hurt, I extend my deepest apologies. Hopefully from now on I may continue to grow into a better person and successfully eradicate this bitter character of mine permanently.


So, all the best with all of your undertakings. Hopefully this shall shine a little light upon your difficulties as well, fellow readers and friends.

God bless all.







-- a smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

She

She
Her eyes were red
And her cheeks were wet,
At the top of her voice,
She told the world to stop.
She was getting off.
Four tries,
Two hearts,
A million chances,
Two thousand little pieces,
One prick.
A love in exchange for her freedom,
The fight to gain his trust,
The urge to please and care for,
And it comes to me again,
Was it ever worth it?
Hit the nail on the head and let go,
She won't listen to me anymore,
Out of control,
Finds no ounce of hope,
She dies down.
As she waits for the Sun to come around
Once again.


A lot of this poem along with its title was inspired by the entry that Cynthia wrote for me. Part of it was inspired by the story I had written for the Dublin Essay Competition. But it overall just sums up how I feel. Its about a girl who's tired of the life she's been living, tired of the world treating her the way it does. It's about how she undergoes the most painful of heartaches and how she persists at giving her loved one third and forth tries even after all the hurts he's caused her. She tries endlessly, giving up so much of herself to him even after meeting with failure and one day just wonders whether it was all ever worth it. But it was too late for that because she had fallen to far in to come back out again. Finding no hope of her love to be returned, all she can do now is wait for Him to work out His plan.